Let Your Yes Be Yes and Your No Be No.

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Disciplining Children With Appropriate Parental Responds

Someone once told me that there are two kinds of love.

The great love and the small love.

What do we mean by small love? In our modern day society, we are seeing more and more of this. Parents who are too busy with their careers may feel guilty about not being able to spend time with their children. They usually land up "buying" love to ease their guilt.

They may shower the kids with material comforts but very little of time and attention were afforded. They may find themselves agreeing to their children's requests, even for things that are obviously not good for them.As long as the child seems happy with their agreement, they get a false sense that they had shown their love for him and done their part.

Do they love their children? I am sure they do. However, without understanding this and the consequences, they will be heading for rough times in later years.

To simply love someone and to love someone in an appropriate way, are two very different disciplines. One is controlled by the heart and the other by the head.

The great love, on the other hand, does not waiver from what is right in order to see a smile on the face. The guideline has to be set clearly and followed firmly. This does not mean that there is no room for understanding, but where understanding is called for, it has to be free from guilt. It has to be borne out of love.

It is always easier to give in to a child's request for that would almost always bring forth a happy response from him. Who does not like a smiling face, especially if it is from your own child? But there are times when we as parents need to exercise refrain.

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Not only in refraining the child from doing wrong, but also in refraining ourselves from taking that seemingly irresistible short cut by saying "yes" to the child.

Many times, it is not easy and it hurts to say "NO" even when you know it is for his own good.

When that happens, you will have to decide if you are going to give your child your Great Love, or the smaller one.